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 + leaving fear and ego at the door mean that i'm not afraid to talk to anyone. even people who i admire beyond belief. some of my closest friends are people that had my ego stopped me i would have never talked to. on weds night i walked past that fear again. and last night the new person i was friendly too came up to me post show and remembered me and said a specific hello. i had brought him some of my own art to share just in case this exact thing happened. he looked like a kid on xmas. surprised, happy and charmed. and then he rushed off to the destination that had caused him to cross my path.

+ horns. omfg the horns. 

+ talking to some guys outside post show and finding a trombone player. hot damn how exciting would it be to ADD HORNS to a vagabondage set?

+ sitting in the car for 30 mins talking to punk about jazz and our exciting project that is in the works. omg. still tempted to call him during one of the zorn shows and just leave the phone on so he can hear this insanity. remembering his reaction to cobra is one of my favorite concert memories. trumped only (so far) by rooster's face during some of masada string trio on weds. 

+ tears coming to my eyes yesterday. a. while reading a friends manuscript. b. while hearing the sax do THAT THING. c. while listening and having the music wash over me. d. when texting a friend about love and music. e. while watching masada clips online to send [livejournal.com profile] sagahar  as we late night band / music geeked out over IM

+ new vagabondage song rolling in to our brains. words rolling around making themselves heard.

+ believing in all of the good things and trusting that they are real.

+/- realizing that now that i have a job i like it's even easier to see the road i should walk in front of me. all of the time that used to be consumed by trying to not be miserable is now just open. and so i feel incredibly open. to everything. to all of the possibilities.

+ new project / collaboration that i am so excited for. it's going to challenge my tech abilities but i am ready to go for it.

- still working out how the new income breaks down in the day to day impact and not so good at it yet. something is needed to make up the difference. but something will come.
emchy: (Default)
San Francisco Arts Commission

SFAC Newsletters

Central Subway Public Art Program: Call for Artists

[Unknown site tag]The San Francisco Arts Commission is seeking applications from professional artists working in all visual arts media for the Central Subway, which will extend light rail service from the T-Third Street Rail north under Fourth and Stockton Streets through the South of Market, Union Square and Chinatown neighborhoods in San Francisco.

Application Deadline: Wednesday, April 30, 2008

All applications must be submitted through CaFÉ, an internet application service at www.callforentry.org

This call to artists is intended to expand the Central Subway Artist Pool first established in 2005. Artist Pool candidates will be considered for a variety of art opportunities at each station, including, but not limited to, large wall and ceiling surfaces, glass elevator exteriors, large open spaces for hanging artworks, and opportunities on the entryway, mezzanine, concourse and platform levels, and areas adjacent to the stations. The Arts Commission anticipates multiple phases of site identification and artist selection for the Central Subway Public Art Program throughout the rest of 2008 and at a subsequent phase in the process.

Workshop for artists:

Tuesday, March 18, 2008 from 6:00 to 8:00 PM

Chinese Culture Center

Hilton Hotel, 750 Kearny Street, 3rd Floor

At this workshop, Arts Commission staff will provide artists with general information about the Central Subway, including potential sites for artwork, and show examples of existing art-in-transit artworks locally, nationally, and internationally. Application guidelines and processes will be discussed and a demonstration of CaFÉ, an online application system, will be presented.

Please note: Workshops are free and open to the public. This workshop is not mandatory for artists interested in submitting an application.

Workshops are free and open to the public. This workshop is not mandatory for artists interested in submitting an application.
For further information about this project please visit: http://www.sfartscommission.org/pubart/projects/central_subway/index.htm

: http://www.sfartscommission.org/pubart/projects/central_subway/index.htm
Contact Mary Chou, Public Art Program, with any questions at mary.chou@sfgov.org or 415-252-3215.
emchy: (Default)
it's been a hard night. looking through the looking glass and seeing the distortions that other people can see. it's not that they're always wrong. but it's... distorted. off. not right. tonight i get to look through all the funhouse mirrors. i think i prefer the flat reflections - honestly.

unrelated to but in the same timeframe. the reading was good tonight. it was small with us three readers but it went well. i am developing a new nervous twitch when i read. not sure how i feel about that - but c'est la vie these things happen. i was sad that ali wasn't reading. and then realized that tomorrow night is a fancy sister spit reading at city lights. ah ha! so the readers are spread out. now it all makes sense.

i was talking to some folks about curatorial issues on sunday night. fuck man curating is a thankless job. i love it. but really. all that work to help ensure other people's art gets the love and attention. it's important and i always try to feature or schedule performers whose voices are crucial and important and maybe even life changing to the right person in the audience. but sometimes i do want to just sit back and go to other people's readings. to sit back and just be a writer. work on just my own work and not all of the word of mouth to get people to come and know about and want to see the amazing reader. and then i hear people bitch about this that and the other and i just wonder if they know how much work and thought goes into trying to make space for art. i wonder if it's worth it. but it is. it totally is. regardless of anything else - making space for art in the world is necessary. making accessible space for that art - is necessary.

i think tomorrow night we finish the holiday decorations. this is our ninth holiday season together. i remember when i was all angry punk rock and FUCK CHRISTMAS. first holiday with rooster i had flipped from fuck it to where's my tree. kinda hilarious. i can't wait to put on eartha kitt's santa baby and just decorate the crap out of the house.

the moon is huge tonight. i am hoping it's holding some good good dreams.
emchy: (Default)
tonight i was roosters date for a classical guitar recital at her classmates home in noe valley. her classmates husband is off to singapore for some crazy fancy guitar world competition and so they're having recitals now to help prepare him for the competition. he played and alternated with a friend of his who he had gone to the conservatory of music with. the night in theory finished with a guitar violin tango duet that was amazing. but with so many musicians in the house a classical / avante guitar jam quickly ensued. a woman fainted from the heat and the herbs she had partaken of. it was kind of wild. it reminded me of what i always thought art salons in paris would be like. we were hoping to split the difference and make it to sizzle so rooster could be my date - but sadly it was not to be. i met a mexican dj named hector. he seemed nice. apparently in mexico there are huge billboards of him for what a great dj he is. i asked him where he played though and he just said everywhere. that made me sad. i would've loved a touchpoint for what style of dj he was. so yea. surrounded by art last night and now tonight and even this afternoon at accordion apocalypse and... i am tired and a little sad but it's been an amazing day. totally enjoying this new - having enough energy to leave the house - thing that the supplements and decent food are allowing.

i am even looking into a local art collective. yea. things are in the works. i like it that way. 
emchy: (Default)
this is one of the most interesting and sexy memes i have seen

Behind a cut, post a list of five artists who have influenced your own work, style, or appreciation of art (if you're not an artist) greatly. Include up to three pieces by each artist and one photo of the artist. Explain briefly how you found the artist in question.

ETA - sleep deprived me did only three - now there are five

emchy: (Default)
i love art.

i love the art that my "community" creates.
i love the art that my peers make.
i love art that doesn't relate to my experience but helps me know what other people go through
i love art that tells my story reflected back at me
i love art that inspires me
i love art that disgusts me and makes me look at why
i love art that makes me react
i love art that has nothing to do with me and still makes my eyes water with a shared human connection

this is why i go to open mics
this is why i run an open mic
this is why i read / go to museums / go to film festivals / buy music
this is why i bother

each of us. every fucking one of us. has a uniue and important story to tell.
it matters. goddamn it. IT MATTERS. for each person giving their story breath it gives another person breath to keep going.
OUR LIVES MATTER. this is why to bother. to keep writing, telling, creating.  i really and honestly believe that it matters. morals or not. if the story has salvation or ends up in the gutter. straight love, gay love, poly, queer, gender bending, trans, bisexual, swinger or whatever your flavor love. it all matters very much. WE all matter very much. as people. we matter. regardless of our sobriety or lack there of. regardless of how our morals fit in with each other. regardless of what we each hold sacred. even when we find no common space to agree - we all still have the stories and the lives that matter.

music that has no lyrics can be profane. music made up of only blasphemous profanity can be sacred. you never know where other people are going to find their holy.

it's not for me to judge.  i just want to. in this one life that i know i have. to encourage. to foster. and to view and appreciate as much art / music / film / literature / poetry / performance / story telling / experience as i humanly can. and to take away from that as much transformative and wisdom as my open heart allows.

that is all. that i can possibly. want. to do.
emchy: (Default)
so the biggest thing i took away from last nights show i wasn't able to articulate until this morning.
theres a lot of talk about how non trans folks can be trans allies - and rightly so. what i heard in Gina and Storm and Prado's pieces was this crucial piece that I so rarely hear talked about. how can trans folks be allies back. to the women. to the queers. to each other. and i was so moved. because when we do choose to be a part of the same community. as friends, chosen family, lovers - there has to be reciprocity. all of our journeys have hardships, and we have to be the allies of people we love  (both personally love and in a larger social / philosophical model love)- otherwise it all just falls apart.

Storm talked about how he tries and wants to be an ally to women. To femmes. To remember that place and to not let the sexism slide just because sometimes it's a lot easier to -as a guy- let the bitches comments roll away. To not see some of the fucked up shit.

Prado talked about being a man - and not a boy - and making very specific decisions about what kind of man he wanted to be. There isn't just one model.  There are many - and the one that is about taking responsibility was what he talked about. Some people thought he dropped some controversial bombs by talking about things that have happened in our community. An accused rape - that while the reality of what happened was muddy, the accused tried to explain away responsibility. Personally I think that only the two people in the room know what happened. But I do know that when any person of any gender calls rape - I want it to be heard and respected. I don't want community lynch mobs going after people - but dismissing a claimed crime is an ugly other side of the extreme. (and can someone clear up exactly what Breedlove's comment from the audience was - b/c i think i am remembering it wrong)

And Gina - amazing Gina - read about the Mich Fest article for Curve. But damn gurl where you hit me so had it made me cry with my own face in the mirror was talking about bodies. How feminine people (of all genders) are assumed bottoms, are assumed pliant, are assumed consent, are - as you put it "as good as our holes." Talking about how people who are more masculine and are changing their bodies are supposed to be given carte blanche for body boundaries and issues and the same is not true for those of us that swing more on the girl side.

Susan Stryker was awesome - and wanted us to touch in with our anger - our rage - at the increase in transphobia in the queer community in SF.  She had us stand up and do a collective yell which made me so uncomfortable that I kind of shut down for the rest of the night. I have myself set up in very specific ways and collective shouting involves a certain amount of personal honesty and letting go of control that really - i would rather work out by myself.

But it just seemed like - moving forward - this idea of - how are we all allies to each other. This is the crux of it right?
How am i an ally to gay men, other dykes, womyn, trans men, trans women, bisexuals as i walk in the world on a daily basis?
What does that look like?
emchy: (Default)
and you think i am kidding but i am not. last night getting to see grindhouse, which i have been out of my skin jumpy excited about since SEPTEMBER, i had the pre movie happy adrenaline. i got the OMG look at what they did with the: trailers. credit fonts. cameos. film burns. film treatments. action sequences. gratuitous. bad ass. action. adrenaline. jumpy. fire. guns. cameos. etc.

and then i got to TALK about it. and get home and TALK MORE about it. and all the out of my skin jumpy excited that i used to walk in about pop culture and film and music on a daily basis is back and kind of kicking my ass / exhausting me because all i want to do is talk and talk really fast and jump around and find more movies to see and go read variety and sight and sound and dig into it all like i used to do when i had two large legal sized filing cabinets overflowing with clipped magazine and academic and whatever i could find articles on every single music/art/film thing that i liked so that i could have a place to store the archives of knowledge that i was pouring through all of the time b/c i had free access to essentially every magazine published. for realz.

and now NOW i find out that zorn has a great american music hall show in november and my tickets are bought and omg music and jazz and avante and noise and WOW WOW WOW and i am so excited and i can't even stand it and i just want to go and BUY lots of MAGAZINES and MUSIC and MOVIES and watch and think and talk and explore and find new places in my brain that think all new kinds of ways

and tonight if QOM and i am so excited to hear more art and more people and poetry and reading and wowowowowowow.

btw - i am reading at poems under the dome at city hall on monday. poemdome.com i think. wanna come?

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