(no subject)
Oct. 29th, 2006 09:42 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
emchyburst of energy
made coffee
called friend to confirm later plans
most of my day is all about me and excel and getting work done for the day job
hate that
sigh.
waiting for coffee to finish creating itself
it's the kind of weather where when i was a kid my mom would hand me a diet coke, and say throw on your clothes and let's go and we would go shopping and eat crappy fast food breakfast on the way and only slightly less crappy mall food for lunch but we would have that 30 minute drive there and the lunch and the drive home to be together and talk about pop culture and i would talk a lot about my friends and it was good...
i miss her... i would feel so taken care of on those days. ironic - since most of the time at the mall i was wandering around solo and being all me by myself... but really it was the way that i would feel most loved because of how much time we would have to talk and be with each other. kinda of sad now that i am writing about it that all of our bonding was just around her spending money... around this mall culture consumerism... and driving... i don't think my thoughts are quite fully former around this yet...
i just know that i am sitting here waiting for coffee and can feel the missing of her like a physical twisting wrench in my chest. and just a heavy heavy sad. she wrote me recently, said she might be saving money to come visit soon. i hope so. here feels so much more like home to me... especially since moving to the new house and it feels weird that both of my parents are so far away from where i feel home now.
made coffee
called friend to confirm later plans
most of my day is all about me and excel and getting work done for the day job
hate that
sigh.
waiting for coffee to finish creating itself
it's the kind of weather where when i was a kid my mom would hand me a diet coke, and say throw on your clothes and let's go and we would go shopping and eat crappy fast food breakfast on the way and only slightly less crappy mall food for lunch but we would have that 30 minute drive there and the lunch and the drive home to be together and talk about pop culture and i would talk a lot about my friends and it was good...
i miss her... i would feel so taken care of on those days. ironic - since most of the time at the mall i was wandering around solo and being all me by myself... but really it was the way that i would feel most loved because of how much time we would have to talk and be with each other. kinda of sad now that i am writing about it that all of our bonding was just around her spending money... around this mall culture consumerism... and driving... i don't think my thoughts are quite fully former around this yet...
i just know that i am sitting here waiting for coffee and can feel the missing of her like a physical twisting wrench in my chest. and just a heavy heavy sad. she wrote me recently, said she might be saving money to come visit soon. i hope so. here feels so much more like home to me... especially since moving to the new house and it feels weird that both of my parents are so far away from where i feel home now.
